For the past month I've been a lot of things. So much so, in fact, that the other day when a person asked how I was and what I've been up to I didn't know how to respond or where to begin.
I've been busy with work but I've also taken time to post about 80s movies (a type of hobby of mine). Steven and I go out every once in a while, whether it be to eat or go to the clubs or to do some shopping, so that's kept me busy, too. But another thing I've been doing is hosting karaoke at The Mix two nights a week. I suppose when I say I've been busy lately that would be an accurate statement.
I try to relax by late afternoon or by the end of the work day and have become quite successful at it. When we're not going out, Steven and I stay sit or lay on the sofa and watch a movie or whatever happens to catch our interest on the tele.
I don't rehearse as often as I used to. What had been piano practicing at least once a week has turned into more like once a month. I don't like that. Out of the 40+ years I've been playing the piano and singing, this is the least I've ever practiced. There's not much of a reason to, really. I'm not leading worship for church services on a regular basis anymore and I don't anticipate being in concert any time soon. In fact, it might even be a few years before I perform in front of people again. I liked doing it for a period of time, but then the "fire" or "passion" just wasn't there anymore. Perhaps it's because when I was in concert last year (four performances), attendance was so low that I figured, "Why bother?" Advertising was done, fliers were put up, word-of-mouth was achieved... a lot of time and money was invested. For the end result to be so dismal -- 25-30 in attendance -- was disheartening. Even people I hung out with on a regular basis or knew rather well didn't show up. It's not that I'm bad at what I do. I quite gifted. Even though a couple of the concerts didn't have any Christian, gospel or religious songs in them, people didn't show up. The feedback I got was because the concerts were held in a church. My response to that is "So what?"
The way I was raised is that friends are there for each other regardless. If one doesn't believe in God, that's fine. I can understand why. What I can't understand is not being able to be at a church for no more than an hour-and-a-half to support your friend simply because it offends a level of comfort. The church is a building. Is there a crucifix or religious symbols placed in various places? Certainly. It's a church. Was there preaching going on or Christian songs being sung or repentance being suggested for sins that should be atoned for? No. So I just don't get it. I doubt I ever will. Especially when the church I performed in was LGBT-friendly.
Sometimes I wish I lived somewhere else where I could just start over. Would I still want to be an apartment manager? I think so. I'm pretty good at it. Would I still want to be with Steven? Of course. Though we challenge each other sometimes within the small confines of our 1-bedroom apartment and disagree on a topic here and there, I still love him. I wish he and I were closer to family up north. His parents are getting up ther in age, he's missing out on the grandchildren growing up, and I think it'd be good for him to be closer to his children and sister and her family. It's not like we're in another state; we're only two hours or so away from them. I simply believe having family around is healthy for the soul as well as the mind and body (that is unless you can't stand your family). Every once in a while we'll talk about it, but then we come to the realization that not only are things going pretty good right now, the timing just isn't right. So, for now, we wait.
Presently my mind is wandering in various directions: What should or can we do this evening? What work needs to be done next week? What phone calls need to be made? What notices need to be given and to whom? What are we having for supper tonight? That's too many "what's." haha
Another question I have for me personally is why do I continually fail to remember important things I said or promised I'd do? Why am I not writing those things down, drilling them into my brain over and over again? I won't go into specifics, but I know that when I fail at upholding my word the consequence can be quite damaging.
I suppose this would be the place to stop for this entry. All in all, I hope to be a better person. Although I'm human and make mistakes, I know I have it in me to better next time... To not just live, but to live and learn.
Until next time... Cheers!
Saturday, June 1, 2013
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Spring is in the air. The leaves are bursting forth from budded twigs on the trees. Flowers are displaying their brilliant and vibrant colors. Birds are chirping melodious sonnets. And the rays from the sun are dispersing thick clouds, casting them to the Olympic and Cascade mountain regions.
I enjoy days like these. I can relate to the rain and tolerate it, being thankful for it even. That is until it puddles on the roof of this three-story one-hundred-year-old building, causing occasional leak damage to a roof or a wall of a rented apartment. You see, I prefer the warm, pleasant temperatures that allow me to walk about without the need to don a jacket or overcoat. As long as the temperatures stay no higher than the low nineties, I'm content. Otherwise I'm overwhelmed with the feeling of dread and discomfort. Sure, I can exist in it. My heart will still beat and I can still breathe (barely, it seems, though that's an extreme exaggeration). Yet unless there's somewhat of a cool breeze, one might find me indoors with the fans running. One might also find me with a cold, wet cloth either on my forehead or on the top of my head itself, giving aid to the heat the escapes from my cranium. That is my comfort zone. It may appear silly to someone else, but at least I'm comfortable.
I'm half Welsh and half Scottish. That means my skin is a pale and pasty white. If I were a superhero, my skin would be my superpower, blinding others if the sun were to hit it just right. But if it were a cloudy or rainy day, I fear I would be succumbed to the taunts and torments of my ever-present, ever-awaiting enemies (whomever they might be). One time it occurred to me that perhaps I could get a spray tan so as to "fit in" and "look good." I shared that thought with my partner, Steven. His response put a dampner on the whole idea: "Right. A welshman with a tan. That makes a lot of sense." I knew straight away he was right. Dammit. Oh, well. With my luck, I'd probably come out of it looking like some sort of deranged Oompa Loompa wandering about, asking, "Have you seen Willy Wonka?"
Work is going well. I was only half-surprised to have learned the building didn't sell. The man interested in purchasing Parkside seemed to have lost interest toward the end of the thorough inspection. I can't say that I blame him, really. If I were the owner of this apartment building and really wanted to sell it, I'd have replaced the worn carpet in the lobbies and stairways, either re-sealed or replaced the existing roof entirely as throughout the years layer after layer was applied without having ever torn out the existing one, and I'd have replaced the antique-looking, aged, cheap light fixtures. Sure, it's an old building and having old-style light fixtures makes sense. But cheap and rickety, certainly not. I'd also complete certain flooring in living spaces so that rugs wouldn't be needed to cover the pressboard currently filling those spaces (why it's like that, I have absolutely no idea... but it kills an opportunity to rent an apartment just about every time).
Parkside Apartments is a charming building. It truly is. I love it here, especially with its location being directly across the street from Wright Park and conveniently located within walking distance to various shoppes, restaurants, pubs, an indepently run movie theater, our veterinarian, grocery shopping, bus lines, downtown, and so much more. The three-story brick H-shaped building with its grand entrance makes people feel as though they're in the historic Stadium Distric of Tacoma, which they are. The building just needs some cosmetic work done, that's all.
Presently, all 28 of the one-bedroom and two-bedroom apartments of this building are occupied. Two will become available soon, but I already have people interested in those units and I haven't even shown them yet. However, because of the market value, property taxes, and whatnot, I will be increasing the rent of ten different units. This could be bad, but it could also be good. It could be bad because I could lose good tenants, but it could be good because the rent is only being increased by $50.00 for the most part and it could mean I'd lose tenants of whom I don't really care to have here anyway; tenants who tend to bend or break the rules, who consistently pay rent late, who tend to have repetitive maintenance issues caused by they themselves, or who are just flat out messy. I've mentioned this idea via e-mail to both my boss as well as to the owners of the building and that I intend for the rent increase to be effective come the first of June. The owners are okay with the idea, but I have yet to hear from my boss. I mentioned to him that because I'd want to give the tenants at least a month's notice of the rent increase, I'd want to hear from him soon. I suppose I should have either defined the word, "soon," or I should have been more clear as to when I'd appreciate a response from him.
I've been manager here for nine months. In that time, I've been to three mandatory training meetings, two of which had absolutely nothing to do with my line of work. It's my opinion that if I don't do construction or electric work, then I don't need to attend safety classes regarding such. I appreciate the safety manuel of which I received at the first meeting, but to attend a class of which the self-proclaimed inexperienced speaker refused to use the microphone which caused most of his words to fall on deaf ears and then end his whatever-it-was with, "I know this subject doesn't fall in line with the work that a lot of you do, but read the safety manuel because that's what's it's there for,".... really?!? I could have read it in my own office instead of sitting on the bus for an hour to travel to Seattle, eat a provided "lunch" that was less appealing than that of a meal I'd get on a plane, sit in a one-and-a-half-hour meeting that entailed a meaningless topic that had nothing to do with my profession or title, and then sit on the bus again for yet another hour heading home. That was a complete waste of my day.
Sometimes it's as if the only moments my boss actually gives a damn about what I do is when I make a mistake. The corporate office located in Seattle. That's where he is. He oversees where the money is going, who gets hired and where, and what policies are being followed and what aren't. Too many times, however, the perception I get is that he, his assistant and the company care only about what other properties are doing. When it comes to properties that are located an hour or further away, well... who cares? It's unimportant. Again, that's the perception. I look at it that way because of many reasons, one being that up until two or three weeks ago neither my boss nor his assistant made a visit to this property since before Christmas of last year. That is against what the owners requested. The owners, a wonderful husband and wife team in their sixties, requested monthly visits of which has yet to take place.
At the last business meeting I attended up in Seattle there was a correspondence sheet for those in attendance to fill out. Questions were asked such as, "Did you like the speaker?", "Was the meeting at a good time and day for you?", "How was the lunch?", and, my favorite, "Is there anything you would like discussed at a future training meeting?" I was so eager to answer that question. In fact, I did. Then, after thinking about it, I severely crossed out what I suggested because I didn't want to cause a problem (had I to do it over again, I would have left it as our names were not asked for on the sheets). Effective communication. It is essential in any and all relationships. It's a pet peeve of mine. When I was involved in the ministry and with churches, I used to teach courses on that and time management. I was even invited to speak at seminars. For such a lack of communication to be so commonplace in what is considered by many to be such a prestigious company having been around since the early 1940s, not only am I beside myself with bewilderment and confusion, but I'm also gobsmacked. I talk more with the owners of the building than I do with the company I work for. In fact, not only that, but the owners hear from me more often than they do from the company they hired to be their property managers. I'm in contact with the owners once every one-and-a-half to two months. For them to hear from me (someone they've known less than a year) more than they do the company (someone they've done business with for quite a few years) is, in my book, inexcusable and poor.
The owners live in Hawaii. They will be landing in Seattle later today and will be staying for a few months in their "home away from home" as they have family in the area. They would also like to do some remodeling work in one of the units at the Travis building (of which I managed for them along with the Parkside for six months until my boss finally found a new manager to be on-site). I'm fully aware they'll be checking in with me from time to time. Honestly, I can't wait to see them and eagerly look forward to our visits. They, too, don't care for the way my boss and his assistant have been handling things (or perhaps I should say, not handled things).
Am I being disrespectful? Just a smidge. I lay claim to that knowing it's unappealing. Am I right in feeling or thinking the way I do? Yes. I say that because I've been in and out of the apartment management business for over sixteen years and have an idea as to what works and what doesn't. Growing up, I watched my mum and da manage apartment complexes as well. So I learned a bit even then. I'm thankful for where I'm at and I'm thankful for what I do. I refuse to remain complacent in my management of an apartment building when I know full well I can lay hold of it, clean it up, change things around, and make it better than what it was before I arrived. In the short time I've been manager of this building, that's exactly what I've done. To be frank, I'm only mid-stride in my accomplishments and have much more to do.
That's enough for now. Back to my work, to my life, and to the love of my life, Steven, who makes me smile and laugh each and every day.
Until next time...
I enjoy days like these. I can relate to the rain and tolerate it, being thankful for it even. That is until it puddles on the roof of this three-story one-hundred-year-old building, causing occasional leak damage to a roof or a wall of a rented apartment. You see, I prefer the warm, pleasant temperatures that allow me to walk about without the need to don a jacket or overcoat. As long as the temperatures stay no higher than the low nineties, I'm content. Otherwise I'm overwhelmed with the feeling of dread and discomfort. Sure, I can exist in it. My heart will still beat and I can still breathe (barely, it seems, though that's an extreme exaggeration). Yet unless there's somewhat of a cool breeze, one might find me indoors with the fans running. One might also find me with a cold, wet cloth either on my forehead or on the top of my head itself, giving aid to the heat the escapes from my cranium. That is my comfort zone. It may appear silly to someone else, but at least I'm comfortable.
I'm half Welsh and half Scottish. That means my skin is a pale and pasty white. If I were a superhero, my skin would be my superpower, blinding others if the sun were to hit it just right. But if it were a cloudy or rainy day, I fear I would be succumbed to the taunts and torments of my ever-present, ever-awaiting enemies (whomever they might be). One time it occurred to me that perhaps I could get a spray tan so as to "fit in" and "look good." I shared that thought with my partner, Steven. His response put a dampner on the whole idea: "Right. A welshman with a tan. That makes a lot of sense." I knew straight away he was right. Dammit. Oh, well. With my luck, I'd probably come out of it looking like some sort of deranged Oompa Loompa wandering about, asking, "Have you seen Willy Wonka?"
Work is going well. I was only half-surprised to have learned the building didn't sell. The man interested in purchasing Parkside seemed to have lost interest toward the end of the thorough inspection. I can't say that I blame him, really. If I were the owner of this apartment building and really wanted to sell it, I'd have replaced the worn carpet in the lobbies and stairways, either re-sealed or replaced the existing roof entirely as throughout the years layer after layer was applied without having ever torn out the existing one, and I'd have replaced the antique-looking, aged, cheap light fixtures. Sure, it's an old building and having old-style light fixtures makes sense. But cheap and rickety, certainly not. I'd also complete certain flooring in living spaces so that rugs wouldn't be needed to cover the pressboard currently filling those spaces (why it's like that, I have absolutely no idea... but it kills an opportunity to rent an apartment just about every time).
Parkside Apartments is a charming building. It truly is. I love it here, especially with its location being directly across the street from Wright Park and conveniently located within walking distance to various shoppes, restaurants, pubs, an indepently run movie theater, our veterinarian, grocery shopping, bus lines, downtown, and so much more. The three-story brick H-shaped building with its grand entrance makes people feel as though they're in the historic Stadium Distric of Tacoma, which they are. The building just needs some cosmetic work done, that's all.
Presently, all 28 of the one-bedroom and two-bedroom apartments of this building are occupied. Two will become available soon, but I already have people interested in those units and I haven't even shown them yet. However, because of the market value, property taxes, and whatnot, I will be increasing the rent of ten different units. This could be bad, but it could also be good. It could be bad because I could lose good tenants, but it could be good because the rent is only being increased by $50.00 for the most part and it could mean I'd lose tenants of whom I don't really care to have here anyway; tenants who tend to bend or break the rules, who consistently pay rent late, who tend to have repetitive maintenance issues caused by they themselves, or who are just flat out messy. I've mentioned this idea via e-mail to both my boss as well as to the owners of the building and that I intend for the rent increase to be effective come the first of June. The owners are okay with the idea, but I have yet to hear from my boss. I mentioned to him that because I'd want to give the tenants at least a month's notice of the rent increase, I'd want to hear from him soon. I suppose I should have either defined the word, "soon," or I should have been more clear as to when I'd appreciate a response from him.
I've been manager here for nine months. In that time, I've been to three mandatory training meetings, two of which had absolutely nothing to do with my line of work. It's my opinion that if I don't do construction or electric work, then I don't need to attend safety classes regarding such. I appreciate the safety manuel of which I received at the first meeting, but to attend a class of which the self-proclaimed inexperienced speaker refused to use the microphone which caused most of his words to fall on deaf ears and then end his whatever-it-was with, "I know this subject doesn't fall in line with the work that a lot of you do, but read the safety manuel because that's what's it's there for,".... really?!? I could have read it in my own office instead of sitting on the bus for an hour to travel to Seattle, eat a provided "lunch" that was less appealing than that of a meal I'd get on a plane, sit in a one-and-a-half-hour meeting that entailed a meaningless topic that had nothing to do with my profession or title, and then sit on the bus again for yet another hour heading home. That was a complete waste of my day.
Sometimes it's as if the only moments my boss actually gives a damn about what I do is when I make a mistake. The corporate office located in Seattle. That's where he is. He oversees where the money is going, who gets hired and where, and what policies are being followed and what aren't. Too many times, however, the perception I get is that he, his assistant and the company care only about what other properties are doing. When it comes to properties that are located an hour or further away, well... who cares? It's unimportant. Again, that's the perception. I look at it that way because of many reasons, one being that up until two or three weeks ago neither my boss nor his assistant made a visit to this property since before Christmas of last year. That is against what the owners requested. The owners, a wonderful husband and wife team in their sixties, requested monthly visits of which has yet to take place.
At the last business meeting I attended up in Seattle there was a correspondence sheet for those in attendance to fill out. Questions were asked such as, "Did you like the speaker?", "Was the meeting at a good time and day for you?", "How was the lunch?", and, my favorite, "Is there anything you would like discussed at a future training meeting?" I was so eager to answer that question. In fact, I did. Then, after thinking about it, I severely crossed out what I suggested because I didn't want to cause a problem (had I to do it over again, I would have left it as our names were not asked for on the sheets). Effective communication. It is essential in any and all relationships. It's a pet peeve of mine. When I was involved in the ministry and with churches, I used to teach courses on that and time management. I was even invited to speak at seminars. For such a lack of communication to be so commonplace in what is considered by many to be such a prestigious company having been around since the early 1940s, not only am I beside myself with bewilderment and confusion, but I'm also gobsmacked. I talk more with the owners of the building than I do with the company I work for. In fact, not only that, but the owners hear from me more often than they do from the company they hired to be their property managers. I'm in contact with the owners once every one-and-a-half to two months. For them to hear from me (someone they've known less than a year) more than they do the company (someone they've done business with for quite a few years) is, in my book, inexcusable and poor.
The owners live in Hawaii. They will be landing in Seattle later today and will be staying for a few months in their "home away from home" as they have family in the area. They would also like to do some remodeling work in one of the units at the Travis building (of which I managed for them along with the Parkside for six months until my boss finally found a new manager to be on-site). I'm fully aware they'll be checking in with me from time to time. Honestly, I can't wait to see them and eagerly look forward to our visits. They, too, don't care for the way my boss and his assistant have been handling things (or perhaps I should say, not handled things).
Am I being disrespectful? Just a smidge. I lay claim to that knowing it's unappealing. Am I right in feeling or thinking the way I do? Yes. I say that because I've been in and out of the apartment management business for over sixteen years and have an idea as to what works and what doesn't. Growing up, I watched my mum and da manage apartment complexes as well. So I learned a bit even then. I'm thankful for where I'm at and I'm thankful for what I do. I refuse to remain complacent in my management of an apartment building when I know full well I can lay hold of it, clean it up, change things around, and make it better than what it was before I arrived. In the short time I've been manager of this building, that's exactly what I've done. To be frank, I'm only mid-stride in my accomplishments and have much more to do.
That's enough for now. Back to my work, to my life, and to the love of my life, Steven, who makes me smile and laugh each and every day.
Until next time...
Monday, April 15, 2013
Monday, April 15, 2013
Before I divulge too much into my own life and with what all has been happening lately, I want to touch briefly on the horrible incident that took place earlier today in Boston. Two bombs exploded just as runners were crossing the finish line at the Boston Marathon. Well over 100 injured, some quite critically, and, thus far, a couple have been killed including an 8-year old child. When things like this happen, it saddens me. I get bothered and often wonder what the hell is wrong with people. What goes on in one's mind to think that inflicting pain and misery in people's lives is necessary? I simply can't fathom it. I don't want to. I hear of such horrific occurrences and I, even if just for a little while, lose faith in humanity. It makes me want to hermitize myself go live in a town with a population of no more than 1,000 people. I don't think "hermitize" is even a word, but I think you get the general idea. Anyway, my heart and prayers go out to all those affected by this senseless tragedy. I can only hope and pray that one day, someday, the madness will end.
If you didn't know, I've been playing the piano and singing since I was three years of age. I'm not perfect at it, but I will toot my own horn just a smidge and say that I'm pretty good. I'm able to sit down at the piano and just play. What one hears is that which being expressed from my heart. In such cases there have been times when I've had to record the music knowing full well that I'd never be able to go back and play the music the same way again. I also play by ear. There have been times when I've been the preferred pianist at church crusades and whatnot because if the special speaker was going to re-route him or herself onto the chorus of a song, I'd be able to play right along, even if I had never heard the song before.
I've been ministering in music since I was a teenager. I've traveled the west coast of the U.S. (and other states) as well as various places in the U.K. I've recorded independent CDs of songs that I've written and even had a couple of them aired on independent radio stations. When a church I belonged with had a half-hour program on a local TBN affiliate station, I was the singer for their episodes (that went on for about a year). Basically, you name it, I've done it. Not on a huge grandiose scale as most, but I'm proud of the achievements accomplishments I've made. I will say this: no one can put a price on the impact people have have received because of the ministry God has given me and done through me by the power of His Holy Spirit. The expression on their faces -- the looks of joy, the tears, the gratitude -- I will never forget. There were times when I'd be at the local mall with my friends and a stranger would recognize me, come up to me and say something like, "Thank you so much for your ministry!" On one particular occasion that happened and afterward my friend asked, "Who was that?" To which I responded honestly, "I have no idea."
Understand this: That all happened whilst I was a closeted gay man. I imagined myself being in a restaurant with a boyfriend, holding hands with him, and then someone coming up to me and saying, "Aren't you the guy I saw on TBN? What are you doing?!?" And that would devastate not only me, but my ministry as well. Having said that, I didn't come "out" until I was in my mid-thirties. I was even married once! But that's another story altogether.
Anyway, I've spent the past couple of years now getting back into the ministering aspect of things: leading worship, sharing music, performing in concert, even preaching. And all at gay-friendly churches. It's been a few years since I've written songs of my own, and, as of late, I've been feeling those creative juices flowing. It's a goal of mine -- a hope -- that I can be in concert again sometime in July. When I was in concert last year, it had been almost 10 years since I had done so in a church, or anywhere else for that matter. The feeling I had performing/ministering in music was of absolute joy. I was incredibly thankful not just for the ability to have done so, but that God chose to move through me and share my talent and gifting to others.
I have some rehearsing to do. I know I should have delved into sharing information about work, my relationship with Steven, and other things... and there are definitely other things to share! But I must go rehearse. I don't have a piano at home, so I've made arrangements to go to my church for an hour and a half just once a week (not nearly enough) and practice on the grand piano in the sanctuary. Which is where I'm headed now.
So, this is short. I know. I'll make up for it soon enough. I promise.
Until then...
If you didn't know, I've been playing the piano and singing since I was three years of age. I'm not perfect at it, but I will toot my own horn just a smidge and say that I'm pretty good. I'm able to sit down at the piano and just play. What one hears is that which being expressed from my heart. In such cases there have been times when I've had to record the music knowing full well that I'd never be able to go back and play the music the same way again. I also play by ear. There have been times when I've been the preferred pianist at church crusades and whatnot because if the special speaker was going to re-route him or herself onto the chorus of a song, I'd be able to play right along, even if I had never heard the song before.
I've been ministering in music since I was a teenager. I've traveled the west coast of the U.S. (and other states) as well as various places in the U.K. I've recorded independent CDs of songs that I've written and even had a couple of them aired on independent radio stations. When a church I belonged with had a half-hour program on a local TBN affiliate station, I was the singer for their episodes (that went on for about a year). Basically, you name it, I've done it. Not on a huge grandiose scale as most, but I'm proud of the achievements accomplishments I've made. I will say this: no one can put a price on the impact people have have received because of the ministry God has given me and done through me by the power of His Holy Spirit. The expression on their faces -- the looks of joy, the tears, the gratitude -- I will never forget. There were times when I'd be at the local mall with my friends and a stranger would recognize me, come up to me and say something like, "Thank you so much for your ministry!" On one particular occasion that happened and afterward my friend asked, "Who was that?" To which I responded honestly, "I have no idea."
Understand this: That all happened whilst I was a closeted gay man. I imagined myself being in a restaurant with a boyfriend, holding hands with him, and then someone coming up to me and saying, "Aren't you the guy I saw on TBN? What are you doing?!?" And that would devastate not only me, but my ministry as well. Having said that, I didn't come "out" until I was in my mid-thirties. I was even married once! But that's another story altogether.
Anyway, I've spent the past couple of years now getting back into the ministering aspect of things: leading worship, sharing music, performing in concert, even preaching. And all at gay-friendly churches. It's been a few years since I've written songs of my own, and, as of late, I've been feeling those creative juices flowing. It's a goal of mine -- a hope -- that I can be in concert again sometime in July. When I was in concert last year, it had been almost 10 years since I had done so in a church, or anywhere else for that matter. The feeling I had performing/ministering in music was of absolute joy. I was incredibly thankful not just for the ability to have done so, but that God chose to move through me and share my talent and gifting to others.
I have some rehearsing to do. I know I should have delved into sharing information about work, my relationship with Steven, and other things... and there are definitely other things to share! But I must go rehearse. I don't have a piano at home, so I've made arrangements to go to my church for an hour and a half just once a week (not nearly enough) and practice on the grand piano in the sanctuary. Which is where I'm headed now.
So, this is short. I know. I'll make up for it soon enough. I promise.
Until then...
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Three changes lately: The weather has been nicer, I've been working more around my own apartment building and accomplishing more maintenance tasks, and I've taken on a second job: Karaoke host at The Mix on Wednesday evenings.
I love this pleasant and comfortable weather. Blame it on global warming or whatever, but the climate has been quite different these past few years. Last year in March, perhaps later, we had snow. I thought for sure our winter months this year would have found snow on the ground. I even purchased two fifty-pound bags of de-icer for the sidewalks and entry ways. As it turned out, we only had one, maybe two days of a light dusting of snow on the ground. I have UK blood running through my veins. The climate of the Pacific Northwest is a lot like the climate over in the UK only a few degrees cooler. So give me some snow for a few days and I'll be fine. Give me a sprinkly or a light shower of rain and I'll most likely walk in it without an umbrella. Give me blue skies, sunshine, and temperatures anywhere between the mid-seventies to low-nineties and I'll be giddy. But give me temperatures any higher than that and you'll find me indoors with the fans going, a cool cloth on my head, and a pathetic look on my face as I gripe and complain, "It's too flippin' hot!"
Bob is getting along just fine at the other apartment building. I don't know what all he understands or can handle regarding management the apartments as well as the tenants therein, but I think he'll manage. He still has some learning to do, but so did I when I first started with the company (and I had been in and out of the apartment management/maintenance field since I was a teenager). I'm glad he's over there now because that has freed my ability to do work around here. Last week I had only one vacancy. This past Saturday I showed the unit in the morning, took his completed application, sent it in, it was accepted, and then the individual and I signed a thorough lease later that same day. That was awesome! Now I'm completely full. Though I'll have another vacancy come up by the end of April, I'm hoping that it'll be cleaned up, painted, new carpet and blinds installed, and rented by the end of May. Along with the regular office duties, other work I've been able to do around the building has been that of water heater repair, cadet heater installation, tile counter work, installing of over twenty carbon monoxide detectors, and miscellaneous maintenance room tasks. I have a couple of other projects in mind, but they can wait just a little while longer.
For not quite a month I've been the new karaoke host at The Mix on Wednesday nights. I've never done that before, but it's sort familiar territory for me as I used to DJ from time to time. I know how to set the equipment up, work the sound board, get the music going and whatnot. I rather like it. I like to sing, but I also like to help others have a good time. "But, Xade, it's just karaoke." No, not really. I say that because karaoke might be the tool needed for people to express themselves in ways that they might not express themselves at other times in their lives. Whether they sound good or sound bad, they're having a good time and that's the point. Sure, I definitely appreciate it when they sound good. I mean, before I took on this position, do you know how many times I've listened to others sing and tried so hard not to come across as a Simon Cowell? As a "guest judge" for a karaoke contest a few years ago, my remark to one particular singer who sang a selection from Prince and the revolution was, "You just made Prince sound like a pauper!" I can't come across that way whilst I'm working! No matter how bad the person might sound -- even if the person with the microphone had no more than a five note vocal range -- I have to put on a smile and say, "Nice job! Well done!" When it comes to karaoke, you clap. No matter what, you clap. Either you clap because the singer sounded great, or you clap because you're glad the "singer" is done. Either way, you clap.
Life has been... well,... upon pondering about it for a moment, I must say it's been fairly well. Hey, it could always be worse, right? I love the man I'm with and get along with him just fine. I don't have to think too hard as to why I love him. There are many, many reasons. We are lovey-dovey just about every day; not in an over-the-top, "get a room" kind of way. But everyday we hold hands, cuddle, tell each other, "I love you," and truly appreciate and respect one another's company as well as one another's space. I try hard not to exclude him in anything. If there's a place I'd like to go, I ask him if he wants to go with me. If there's something I'd like to do that I think would be fun for the both of us, I ask him if he would like to join me. Even if I'm about to walk into the kitchen to get something, I ask him if there's anything I can get him. It's taken me a long time, perhaps even too long, but I think I've finally learned not to be so selfish or self-centered. And that's a lesson I've had to learn the hard way. But, hey... at least I've learned the lesson.
I've gotten older, too. I can feel it and recognize it. I have more wrinkles and grey hairs. I'm losing hair where I need hair and growing hair where I don't want hair. I get tired earlier and usually am wantin to close my eyes for some much needed sleep by about 10:30 or 11. I've gone from a waist size 32 to 33, maybe 34 depending on the trousers which means, in my opinion, my sands are shifting into sand dunes. My bones ache and creak every once in a while. I don't have the patience for other people's drama any more, no matter who they are. And I'm not even 45 yet! Well, at least not for another month or so. But you know what... I'm happy. Or, to quote what's-his-name from A&E's TV show, "Duck Dynasty," I'm happy, happy, happy.
I won't be able to help out with a church service any more after this month as I'm being required to work in the afternoons on weekends beginning in April, so my last message for a while will be this upcoming Sunday which just so happens to be Easter. I'm really looking forward to that. I've sung at countless Easter services before, but I've never given the message at one. So this will be an absolute joy for me. I'm not sure how many will be in attendance, but that's okay. Whether it be 500 people or just 5, I like the dynamic and energy to be the same. In my opinion, that's how it's supposed to be. And that's the way I like it.
I suppose that's about all for now. Until next time...
I love this pleasant and comfortable weather. Blame it on global warming or whatever, but the climate has been quite different these past few years. Last year in March, perhaps later, we had snow. I thought for sure our winter months this year would have found snow on the ground. I even purchased two fifty-pound bags of de-icer for the sidewalks and entry ways. As it turned out, we only had one, maybe two days of a light dusting of snow on the ground. I have UK blood running through my veins. The climate of the Pacific Northwest is a lot like the climate over in the UK only a few degrees cooler. So give me some snow for a few days and I'll be fine. Give me a sprinkly or a light shower of rain and I'll most likely walk in it without an umbrella. Give me blue skies, sunshine, and temperatures anywhere between the mid-seventies to low-nineties and I'll be giddy. But give me temperatures any higher than that and you'll find me indoors with the fans going, a cool cloth on my head, and a pathetic look on my face as I gripe and complain, "It's too flippin' hot!"
Bob is getting along just fine at the other apartment building. I don't know what all he understands or can handle regarding management the apartments as well as the tenants therein, but I think he'll manage. He still has some learning to do, but so did I when I first started with the company (and I had been in and out of the apartment management/maintenance field since I was a teenager). I'm glad he's over there now because that has freed my ability to do work around here. Last week I had only one vacancy. This past Saturday I showed the unit in the morning, took his completed application, sent it in, it was accepted, and then the individual and I signed a thorough lease later that same day. That was awesome! Now I'm completely full. Though I'll have another vacancy come up by the end of April, I'm hoping that it'll be cleaned up, painted, new carpet and blinds installed, and rented by the end of May. Along with the regular office duties, other work I've been able to do around the building has been that of water heater repair, cadet heater installation, tile counter work, installing of over twenty carbon monoxide detectors, and miscellaneous maintenance room tasks. I have a couple of other projects in mind, but they can wait just a little while longer.
For not quite a month I've been the new karaoke host at The Mix on Wednesday nights. I've never done that before, but it's sort familiar territory for me as I used to DJ from time to time. I know how to set the equipment up, work the sound board, get the music going and whatnot. I rather like it. I like to sing, but I also like to help others have a good time. "But, Xade, it's just karaoke." No, not really. I say that because karaoke might be the tool needed for people to express themselves in ways that they might not express themselves at other times in their lives. Whether they sound good or sound bad, they're having a good time and that's the point. Sure, I definitely appreciate it when they sound good. I mean, before I took on this position, do you know how many times I've listened to others sing and tried so hard not to come across as a Simon Cowell? As a "guest judge" for a karaoke contest a few years ago, my remark to one particular singer who sang a selection from Prince and the revolution was, "You just made Prince sound like a pauper!" I can't come across that way whilst I'm working! No matter how bad the person might sound -- even if the person with the microphone had no more than a five note vocal range -- I have to put on a smile and say, "Nice job! Well done!" When it comes to karaoke, you clap. No matter what, you clap. Either you clap because the singer sounded great, or you clap because you're glad the "singer" is done. Either way, you clap.
Life has been... well,... upon pondering about it for a moment, I must say it's been fairly well. Hey, it could always be worse, right? I love the man I'm with and get along with him just fine. I don't have to think too hard as to why I love him. There are many, many reasons. We are lovey-dovey just about every day; not in an over-the-top, "get a room" kind of way. But everyday we hold hands, cuddle, tell each other, "I love you," and truly appreciate and respect one another's company as well as one another's space. I try hard not to exclude him in anything. If there's a place I'd like to go, I ask him if he wants to go with me. If there's something I'd like to do that I think would be fun for the both of us, I ask him if he would like to join me. Even if I'm about to walk into the kitchen to get something, I ask him if there's anything I can get him. It's taken me a long time, perhaps even too long, but I think I've finally learned not to be so selfish or self-centered. And that's a lesson I've had to learn the hard way. But, hey... at least I've learned the lesson.
I've gotten older, too. I can feel it and recognize it. I have more wrinkles and grey hairs. I'm losing hair where I need hair and growing hair where I don't want hair. I get tired earlier and usually am wantin to close my eyes for some much needed sleep by about 10:30 or 11. I've gone from a waist size 32 to 33, maybe 34 depending on the trousers which means, in my opinion, my sands are shifting into sand dunes. My bones ache and creak every once in a while. I don't have the patience for other people's drama any more, no matter who they are. And I'm not even 45 yet! Well, at least not for another month or so. But you know what... I'm happy. Or, to quote what's-his-name from A&E's TV show, "Duck Dynasty," I'm happy, happy, happy.
I won't be able to help out with a church service any more after this month as I'm being required to work in the afternoons on weekends beginning in April, so my last message for a while will be this upcoming Sunday which just so happens to be Easter. I'm really looking forward to that. I've sung at countless Easter services before, but I've never given the message at one. So this will be an absolute joy for me. I'm not sure how many will be in attendance, but that's okay. Whether it be 500 people or just 5, I like the dynamic and energy to be the same. In my opinion, that's how it's supposed to be. And that's the way I like it.
I suppose that's about all for now. Until next time...
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Thursday, March 14th, 2013
These past few days have found myself quite busy. And by "days" I mean weeks. Although I appreciated getting the opportunity to manage 2 different apartment buildings, doing so alone with 65 units to handle as well as the buildings themselves can be quite overwhelming. So I'm glad that, at last, a new manager has been hired for the second building, the T****s Apartments.
Unbeknownst to me, Bob came aboard this past Monday. Last I had heard about the possibility of him becoming manager for the T****s Apartments was last Wednesday when I asked my boss what the current update was. He told me that he was awaiting Bob's paperwork to come through. Come the following Monday morning at 8:35 I got a call from one of the gals who's been working for the company I'm associated with for several years. Seeing who it was, I let it go and felt she could leave a message. After all, I was still laying in bed and hadn't even finished my first cup of coffee. Minutes later I checked her message. She asked if I'd be able to meet her and Bob at the T****s building at 11:30 that morning. I thought, "Excuse me?" First of all, why was she getting a hold of me and not my boss? Even though I was just the temporary manager of the building, I felt it to be very disrespectful that my boss wasn't contacting me himself regarding the matter.
Well, Monday was not a good day at all. Even if it was wide open, my first inclination was to tell her, "No. It, in fact, is not possible for me to meet up with you at 11:30 this morning." The fact was I did have a lot to do that day and I wanted to set aside a good chunk of the day solely for Steven as it was his birthday. I explained that to the woman and asked if we could meet the following day or even the day after that. Her response was Jeremiah really wanted it done that morning and no later. I could not flippin' believe it. So I caved and told her I'd meet her at 11 but that I couldn't stick around long because I had a lot to do. She was fine with that as long as I handed over the keys so Bob could start moving in. No problem.
Bob has been steadily moving in. He's in his late 50s and I get the feeling he's not been a manager of an apartment building before. I had that feeling after showing him around the building yesterday and explaining some things regarding the building, the tenants, office matters and whatnot. I'd been waiting three months for the T****s building to go to someone else. All that time whenever I asked my boss for an update, his response was, "We've interviewed people, but none of them seem right for the job." And this is the guy they put in the position? I wonder if perhaps my boss was getting tired of being hounded by the owners to hire someone that he simply put Bob in the position because he was already working for the company (Bob was doing maintenance work for the woman I mentioned earlier). I've agreed to help Bob out for the next few weeks; to show him a few things, train him a bit, and offer advice or helpful hints whenever necessary or whenever he asks or calls for it. However, I'll not want much of anything to do with the building after four or five weeks time. I had only about three weeks of outside help from others in the company before my boss pretty much said, "It's yours now. It's time for you to figure things out." And that's exactly what I've done.
I've only been manager of the P******e Apartments for 8 months. In that time I've turned chaos into order. I even had all 28 units full for about 2 months until a tenant had to move due to the company he worked for relocating him to another state. I'd like to think the building I manage is a well-oiled machine. It might have a couple of parts that should be looked at or kept an eye on, but for the time being it works just fine. I do what I'm supposed to do, sometimes even more. I think the hard work has paid off, too. Even yesterday my boss told me he appreciated all I was doing.
Yes. I guess things aren't so bad.
I was out and about with Steven this past Saturday evening at a couple of places we frequent. I saw a couple of faces of people whom I knew, one of whom I "unfriended" from Facebook and the other whom is still a "friend" but we don't really talk much. Steven and I saw both of them, yet when we walked close they turned away as if they were either annoyed and flippant or were pretending not to notice us at all. We didn't greet them, either, as we were doing our own thing and enjoying our own company. But for them to make eye contact with both of us from across the room and then turn on their heel and show us their backs or walk away altogether, why, it was if they were acting like snobbish, snooty high school diva wanna-bee's. If they want to act like that, fine. I refuse to drown myself in another person's shallow waters. If they want to talk to me, then I'll suggest they toss aside their little floaties and swim to the deep end where the real men are more than capable to tirelessly tread water without sinking to the bottom.
Speaking of Steven, he and I have been doing pretty good. Like normal couples, we have disagreements every once in a while, but we talk sensibly and work things out. However, he has asked that I not mention him on Facebook. So I won't. I probably shouldn't mention much of him when I blog, either. It's not that I say things bad about him. I wouldn't. But he likes things simple and gets rather uncomfortable when people ask him about things that they read about in my blog yet he didn't know they knew. So I'll respect his privacy as well as his wishes and cease from mentioning anything about him. If you are reading this and wonder how he is, it is my suggestion that you ask him yourself. You'll have to do so in person, though, as Steven doesn't e-mail, text, nor do the whole Facebook or Twitter thing. I know. He's kind of old-school that way. But it's okay. It's the way he is, it's how he wants it, and it's how it will be.
That's about all for now. Until next time...
Unbeknownst to me, Bob came aboard this past Monday. Last I had heard about the possibility of him becoming manager for the T****s Apartments was last Wednesday when I asked my boss what the current update was. He told me that he was awaiting Bob's paperwork to come through. Come the following Monday morning at 8:35 I got a call from one of the gals who's been working for the company I'm associated with for several years. Seeing who it was, I let it go and felt she could leave a message. After all, I was still laying in bed and hadn't even finished my first cup of coffee. Minutes later I checked her message. She asked if I'd be able to meet her and Bob at the T****s building at 11:30 that morning. I thought, "Excuse me?" First of all, why was she getting a hold of me and not my boss? Even though I was just the temporary manager of the building, I felt it to be very disrespectful that my boss wasn't contacting me himself regarding the matter.
Well, Monday was not a good day at all. Even if it was wide open, my first inclination was to tell her, "No. It, in fact, is not possible for me to meet up with you at 11:30 this morning." The fact was I did have a lot to do that day and I wanted to set aside a good chunk of the day solely for Steven as it was his birthday. I explained that to the woman and asked if we could meet the following day or even the day after that. Her response was Jeremiah really wanted it done that morning and no later. I could not flippin' believe it. So I caved and told her I'd meet her at 11 but that I couldn't stick around long because I had a lot to do. She was fine with that as long as I handed over the keys so Bob could start moving in. No problem.
Bob has been steadily moving in. He's in his late 50s and I get the feeling he's not been a manager of an apartment building before. I had that feeling after showing him around the building yesterday and explaining some things regarding the building, the tenants, office matters and whatnot. I'd been waiting three months for the T****s building to go to someone else. All that time whenever I asked my boss for an update, his response was, "We've interviewed people, but none of them seem right for the job." And this is the guy they put in the position? I wonder if perhaps my boss was getting tired of being hounded by the owners to hire someone that he simply put Bob in the position because he was already working for the company (Bob was doing maintenance work for the woman I mentioned earlier). I've agreed to help Bob out for the next few weeks; to show him a few things, train him a bit, and offer advice or helpful hints whenever necessary or whenever he asks or calls for it. However, I'll not want much of anything to do with the building after four or five weeks time. I had only about three weeks of outside help from others in the company before my boss pretty much said, "It's yours now. It's time for you to figure things out." And that's exactly what I've done.
I've only been manager of the P******e Apartments for 8 months. In that time I've turned chaos into order. I even had all 28 units full for about 2 months until a tenant had to move due to the company he worked for relocating him to another state. I'd like to think the building I manage is a well-oiled machine. It might have a couple of parts that should be looked at or kept an eye on, but for the time being it works just fine. I do what I'm supposed to do, sometimes even more. I think the hard work has paid off, too. Even yesterday my boss told me he appreciated all I was doing.
Yes. I guess things aren't so bad.
I was out and about with Steven this past Saturday evening at a couple of places we frequent. I saw a couple of faces of people whom I knew, one of whom I "unfriended" from Facebook and the other whom is still a "friend" but we don't really talk much. Steven and I saw both of them, yet when we walked close they turned away as if they were either annoyed and flippant or were pretending not to notice us at all. We didn't greet them, either, as we were doing our own thing and enjoying our own company. But for them to make eye contact with both of us from across the room and then turn on their heel and show us their backs or walk away altogether, why, it was if they were acting like snobbish, snooty high school diva wanna-bee's. If they want to act like that, fine. I refuse to drown myself in another person's shallow waters. If they want to talk to me, then I'll suggest they toss aside their little floaties and swim to the deep end where the real men are more than capable to tirelessly tread water without sinking to the bottom.
Speaking of Steven, he and I have been doing pretty good. Like normal couples, we have disagreements every once in a while, but we talk sensibly and work things out. However, he has asked that I not mention him on Facebook. So I won't. I probably shouldn't mention much of him when I blog, either. It's not that I say things bad about him. I wouldn't. But he likes things simple and gets rather uncomfortable when people ask him about things that they read about in my blog yet he didn't know they knew. So I'll respect his privacy as well as his wishes and cease from mentioning anything about him. If you are reading this and wonder how he is, it is my suggestion that you ask him yourself. You'll have to do so in person, though, as Steven doesn't e-mail, text, nor do the whole Facebook or Twitter thing. I know. He's kind of old-school that way. But it's okay. It's the way he is, it's how he wants it, and it's how it will be.
That's about all for now. Until next time...
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Sunday, February 24, 2013
It's Oscar Sunday. I remember watching the Oscars with my mum since I was a little boy. It was mum who got me started with my fascination of movies. She'd take me to various theaters to watch many different types of movies, sometimes they were films of the horror genre. As a child, I remember mum telling me to duck down behind the seats in front of me because she just knew something scary was going to happen and didn't want me to be influenced by it. I knew the coast was clear and that I could sit back down in my own seat when I either heard screams from other viewers or popcorn flew above and around me from those startled or both.
Years later I was told why she took me to the movies so often. Mum chose to go to the movies as a way of escaping what was happening at home -- the friction between her and my da. I also learned that she didn't leave me at home with him because she didn't think da would know how to take care of me properly. My father's father died when he was a little boy and his mum never remarried. My mum, as well as my mum's mother, figured that since my da never had that male role model growing up that he wouldn't know how to be a father to me. When I, as an adult in my early thirties, heard those reasonings from my mum, it angered me. It angered me because both she and her mother never really gave him a chance to be the father he could have been. For the most part, the only time he had those fathering moments was when mum was around. I think of that and I wonder that perhaps if he'd have been given the opportunity to father me as best as he knew how, that maybe he wouldn't have left mum and I when I was a teenager.
As far as I know, I'm the last of my family line. With the exception of second cousins and whomever else, I'm it. I was always the only child. I would have had an older brother, but mum miscarried and the baby died (I'll go further to say that the baby wasn't with the man I came to know as my father, but with a different man -- a man of "rebellious and wild ways" -- whom mum knew before she met my father). Both of my grandfathers died before I was born. Both of my grandmothers are gone as well. No aunts, uncles, or cousins. I'm it. As far as I know. No one ever found my father. He disappeared a week before Christmas when I was seventeen and was never heard from again. Mum and I, relatives and friends all tried as best as we could to find him and even had police detectives on the search, but no trace could be found. Many months was spent in the UK as well in hopes that he'd be found, but the end result was he was gone without a trace. When he left, all da took with him was his wallet, his passport, a suitcase of clothes and the car. The car was found at the airport, but he wasn't registered as being on any flight. The detective felt that da left the car there as an attempt to lead the investigation to the airport whilst he fled somewhere else, possibly choosing a different mode of transportation altogether.
It's odd that I should think upon that on this day. As I started writing this entry, I had no idea I'd share that bit of information about my life. I suppose deep in the recesses of my mind I still think about him. My feelings on why he left and in the manner he chose to do so are those of anger and sadness. I haven't known nor seen him for over half my life now, yet I still wonder about him. Of course I've done my research on and off throughout the years whether talking to friends of the family, venturing on-foot throughout different places in the UK we frequented as a family, and even using the internet. Still, nothing. From time to time I'd even check the obituaries of various newspapers, reading as far back as I could or as far back as from when I'd checked it before. Again, nothing. Da wanted to disappear. And disappear, he did.
As I watch the Academy Awards tonight, I wonder if I'll think of him. I wonder if I'll think of the times I had to duck behind seats at mum's command. I wonder if I'll have the feeling of appreciation of loving movies, both new and old, thanks to mum introducing them to me (though her way of going about it could've, in my opinion, been more approving). Sure, I've chosen whom and which film I think will win tonight. But something tells me my mind will be elsewhere. For a while, anyway.
Until nex time...
Years later I was told why she took me to the movies so often. Mum chose to go to the movies as a way of escaping what was happening at home -- the friction between her and my da. I also learned that she didn't leave me at home with him because she didn't think da would know how to take care of me properly. My father's father died when he was a little boy and his mum never remarried. My mum, as well as my mum's mother, figured that since my da never had that male role model growing up that he wouldn't know how to be a father to me. When I, as an adult in my early thirties, heard those reasonings from my mum, it angered me. It angered me because both she and her mother never really gave him a chance to be the father he could have been. For the most part, the only time he had those fathering moments was when mum was around. I think of that and I wonder that perhaps if he'd have been given the opportunity to father me as best as he knew how, that maybe he wouldn't have left mum and I when I was a teenager.
As far as I know, I'm the last of my family line. With the exception of second cousins and whomever else, I'm it. I was always the only child. I would have had an older brother, but mum miscarried and the baby died (I'll go further to say that the baby wasn't with the man I came to know as my father, but with a different man -- a man of "rebellious and wild ways" -- whom mum knew before she met my father). Both of my grandfathers died before I was born. Both of my grandmothers are gone as well. No aunts, uncles, or cousins. I'm it. As far as I know. No one ever found my father. He disappeared a week before Christmas when I was seventeen and was never heard from again. Mum and I, relatives and friends all tried as best as we could to find him and even had police detectives on the search, but no trace could be found. Many months was spent in the UK as well in hopes that he'd be found, but the end result was he was gone without a trace. When he left, all da took with him was his wallet, his passport, a suitcase of clothes and the car. The car was found at the airport, but he wasn't registered as being on any flight. The detective felt that da left the car there as an attempt to lead the investigation to the airport whilst he fled somewhere else, possibly choosing a different mode of transportation altogether.
It's odd that I should think upon that on this day. As I started writing this entry, I had no idea I'd share that bit of information about my life. I suppose deep in the recesses of my mind I still think about him. My feelings on why he left and in the manner he chose to do so are those of anger and sadness. I haven't known nor seen him for over half my life now, yet I still wonder about him. Of course I've done my research on and off throughout the years whether talking to friends of the family, venturing on-foot throughout different places in the UK we frequented as a family, and even using the internet. Still, nothing. From time to time I'd even check the obituaries of various newspapers, reading as far back as I could or as far back as from when I'd checked it before. Again, nothing. Da wanted to disappear. And disappear, he did.
As I watch the Academy Awards tonight, I wonder if I'll think of him. I wonder if I'll think of the times I had to duck behind seats at mum's command. I wonder if I'll have the feeling of appreciation of loving movies, both new and old, thanks to mum introducing them to me (though her way of going about it could've, in my opinion, been more approving). Sure, I've chosen whom and which film I think will win tonight. But something tells me my mind will be elsewhere. For a while, anyway.
Until nex time...
Friday, February 15, 2013
Friday, February 15, 2013
Yesterday, Valentine's Day, was a complete joy. It wasn't fancy or full of swans, dozens of roses, or gobs of chocolates. It was simple. Remember the acronym K.I.S.S.? Keep It Simple Stupid. That's what Valentine's Day was for Steven and I. It was simple, memorable, and full of happiness. Although we had talked a while back about using up a gift card we got for Christmas and going out to eat, Steven wasn't up for that physically as his health is still improving. So after my work day was complete I settled myself at home; ran a couple of errands, did a few chores, the usual. After supper I lit a fire in the fireplace, dimmed the lights, and put a movie on for us to watch as we sat in our recliner sofa. Comfortable. Relaxing. Elegant. And simple. Was it perfect? Perhaps. I don't really think about how perfect or imperfect things are when I'm enjoying the company of the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. Why be distracted by such a thought? I prefer to enjoy the moment I'm in as best as I can without having to think so hard about it. And that's what I did last night.
Work is going smoothly. Or close to it, at least. I do have a vacancy coming up by the end of the month as well as another one in the building I'm temporarily manager of. I wish my boss would hurry up and hire somebody to manage that building. To work so hard at managing both apartment buildings yet not getting medical or dental benefits for doing so doesn't settle well with me in the slightest. I'm working full-time yet not getting what other full-time managers are getting through the company I work for. That, to me, is highly unacceptable. My boss as had almost three months to hire somebody to fill that position and has yet to do so. It is my opinion that through this course of time I'm being taken advantage of. Does that set well with me? Absolutely not. The more I think upon it, the more it grates at the very core of my being. I've known for some time that my blood pressure is higher than normal and can often times feel an ache in my chest. Have I seen a doctor about it? No. Because I can't afford to. And even if I did and got a prescription for heart medicine, I doubt very seriously I'd be able to afford it. Why? Because I don't get benefits!
Look here at my complaints:
* With the exception of the two vacancies coming up, I've gotten both buildings full. Usually one would get a bonus for having done so. But not me. Barely even a "thank you" (that "thank you" came from my boss' assistant, but not my boss himself).
* When the second building fell into my lap unannounced, I proved that I could manage both buildings effectively and efficiently. My boss said I could manage both. But he didn't clear that with the owners of the buildings. So when the owners of the buildings found out about that back in December, they told him they preferred a mananger to live on-site at that building and to hire one. Why would he allow me to manage both buildings without consulting the owners first? Which leads to this...
* About a week-and-a-half before Christmas I was at the other building handing out notices and Christmas cards. During that time Steven was on the laptop and came across an ad. He brought that ad to my attention when I got back to the office. The ad was for the hiring of an on-site manager for the second building I was managing. I was stunned! In the ad was the name and phone number of my boss' assistant. When I called her and asked her what was going on, she didn't know. Not even my boss told her about the ad. I got off the phone with her and then she called me back saying he told her he felt pressured by the owners to hire someone so he placed the ad. She said he would call me back and apologize to me after he got out of a meeting. To this very day I've never gotten that phone call.
* Usually Christmas cards would be mailed or hand-delivered by your boss or the company you work for, right? At least maybe a phone call or a "Merry Christmas" in passing. I mailed Christmas cards to my boss and his assistant. Did I get one? No. Not even an e-mail. No card, no Christmas bonus, nothing. I guess maybe it's a little unrealistic to have expected one, but I'm not used to the "silence" from such during the holidays.
* I "live" in a 2-Bedroom apartment. I say "live" because although it's considered a 2-Bedroom unit, the second bedroom is actually the detached office of the apartment building itself. 2-Bedroom apartments in this building go for approximately $900.00 per month. That's what I pay. My question is this: Why am I paying $900.00 a month for a 2-Bedroom apartment when I actually live in only a 1-Bedroom unit? Why am I paying rent for the office space? Why am I paying rent for something that's work-related? The space Steven and I live in, compared to other units in the building of approximately the same size, should go for at least $725-$750 per month. Now, although the gas and electricity are not in my name but in the name of the company I work for (by boss and owners), I actually am paying those bills when you consider the difference in prices of $725 compared to $900. I am paying for the electricity and gas and even more. I knew this about a month after I started working for the company. Did I mention anything about it? No. Why? Because with the way the economy was and the percentage of unemployment I was glad to have even had a job. And, even though I feel mistreated or disrespected at times, I'm still glad to have a job.
* In early December I sent them the phone bill for the office phone of the other building. They didn't pay it until over a month later. About a week before the payment was received by the phone company, I couldn't receive calls and I couldn't make calls. This meant I couldn't check for messages. It also meant that I couldn't receive phone calls from tenants or others inquiring of vacancies. One would think that of all the bills that need to be paid (electric, gas, phone, vendors, etc.), paying the phone bill is rather important.
I'm not going to go on and on with other times or instances where I felt disrespected. I could, but I won't. I think I've made my point. Both apartment buildings are up for sale, especially the one I'm the on-site manager of. It's my baby. It gets my main attention first and foremost. And the owners have told me that and have absolute confidence in that I can handle the building successfully. But I'm hoping this one sells soon. Because then maybe things will be different. Maybe. There's always a bit of a risk when an apartment building sells. Whoever buys it might want a different manager on-site. Then again they might not, especially after reviewing the rent-rolls and discovering how full the building is. The building I manage has 28 units (the other building has 37). A full building means money is coming in. But if the building has seven or more vacancies in it and has had such month after month after month, something's wrong there. Not to boast, but I'm good at what I do. I've been an apartment building manager on and off for many years. Even my mum and da were apartment managers when I was a teenager. I helped them out with cleaning apartments, painting them, and learned light maintenance skills during that time. So I know a few things. After a while, though, the business starts to wear me down. I don't have an assistant, so I'm on-call all the time. Getting away for even a weekend can be risky.
That's just about how I feel now. A bit worn out. Steven and I have talked over the months about moving back up north so that he can be closer to his family. I'm the last of my family line, so I consider his family my own. It's not quite the same, of course, but they're not from Wales or Scotland, either. So being different is okay. But the more we talk about it and the more we plan, the more we tend to think that things are actually pretty good right now. What used to be considered a probable 95% chance of us moving is currently more like a 60% chance. We doing okay financially in that I'm paid $10.00 per hour above the required 15 hour work week for various manager task duties and $15.00 per hour for whatever painting, cleaning, or maintenance work I do. Steven doesn't work right now, but that's okay. He can't. So he gets government assistance. That combined with my income gets us by without too much of a bother. While I work, he does whatever tasks at home he can: cleaning, laundry, cooking, running errands, and so on. We make a good team and I'm so very thankful for him. I certainly couldn't do both. However, if there's one thing we know it's this: That which is "certain" isn't always so "certain." So we've been saving our money for whatever may come our way.
We've discussed the idea of where we'd live once we move to Skagit County. Steven's parents have a lot at a secured and very wooded campground. Although we wouldn't stay on their lot, there are other lots for sale of which are quite affordable. Steven's rather new trailer, which is for sale, could be taken off the market and put on whichever lot best suits us. We'd be living simply, that's for sure. We'd have to downsize considerably, which is something we've also discussed and planned for. If that were to happen, we'd still have enough money to float us a few months before I'd have to look for another job. If, however, the trailer were to sell, we'd look into buying a used mobile home. That could be costly which would mean I'd have to find a job right away.
Anyway, we've been planning. We've both considered having the big move happen sometime toward the end of May. But, well, now we're not so sure. We have friends here, I'm involved in a church here, I'm working and we have a nice home (we're paying too much for it, but it's still nice). On the other hand, Steven's family is up north: His mum and da, his son and his girlfriend, his sister and her husband and children, and Steven's daughter and son-in-law and their two children. If we stayed here, we'd have to get a vehicle that's more dependable so that Steven or both he and I could head up north at least once a month. I know Steven could definitely have a fulfilling and pleasant week up there every once in a while. He's missing out on too much of their lives. Seeing family during Thanksgiving, Christmas or Easter... that's just not enough. Steven is down here because of me, because he wanted us to get back together and try being in a relationship again. And he has me. God knows he does.
All I can say right now is this: Things are the way they are. And though I'm thankful for the now, it's only in planning things out that I can be thankful for the then.
Until next time...
Work is going smoothly. Or close to it, at least. I do have a vacancy coming up by the end of the month as well as another one in the building I'm temporarily manager of. I wish my boss would hurry up and hire somebody to manage that building. To work so hard at managing both apartment buildings yet not getting medical or dental benefits for doing so doesn't settle well with me in the slightest. I'm working full-time yet not getting what other full-time managers are getting through the company I work for. That, to me, is highly unacceptable. My boss as had almost three months to hire somebody to fill that position and has yet to do so. It is my opinion that through this course of time I'm being taken advantage of. Does that set well with me? Absolutely not. The more I think upon it, the more it grates at the very core of my being. I've known for some time that my blood pressure is higher than normal and can often times feel an ache in my chest. Have I seen a doctor about it? No. Because I can't afford to. And even if I did and got a prescription for heart medicine, I doubt very seriously I'd be able to afford it. Why? Because I don't get benefits!
Look here at my complaints:
* With the exception of the two vacancies coming up, I've gotten both buildings full. Usually one would get a bonus for having done so. But not me. Barely even a "thank you" (that "thank you" came from my boss' assistant, but not my boss himself).
* When the second building fell into my lap unannounced, I proved that I could manage both buildings effectively and efficiently. My boss said I could manage both. But he didn't clear that with the owners of the buildings. So when the owners of the buildings found out about that back in December, they told him they preferred a mananger to live on-site at that building and to hire one. Why would he allow me to manage both buildings without consulting the owners first? Which leads to this...
* About a week-and-a-half before Christmas I was at the other building handing out notices and Christmas cards. During that time Steven was on the laptop and came across an ad. He brought that ad to my attention when I got back to the office. The ad was for the hiring of an on-site manager for the second building I was managing. I was stunned! In the ad was the name and phone number of my boss' assistant. When I called her and asked her what was going on, she didn't know. Not even my boss told her about the ad. I got off the phone with her and then she called me back saying he told her he felt pressured by the owners to hire someone so he placed the ad. She said he would call me back and apologize to me after he got out of a meeting. To this very day I've never gotten that phone call.
* Usually Christmas cards would be mailed or hand-delivered by your boss or the company you work for, right? At least maybe a phone call or a "Merry Christmas" in passing. I mailed Christmas cards to my boss and his assistant. Did I get one? No. Not even an e-mail. No card, no Christmas bonus, nothing. I guess maybe it's a little unrealistic to have expected one, but I'm not used to the "silence" from such during the holidays.
* I "live" in a 2-Bedroom apartment. I say "live" because although it's considered a 2-Bedroom unit, the second bedroom is actually the detached office of the apartment building itself. 2-Bedroom apartments in this building go for approximately $900.00 per month. That's what I pay. My question is this: Why am I paying $900.00 a month for a 2-Bedroom apartment when I actually live in only a 1-Bedroom unit? Why am I paying rent for the office space? Why am I paying rent for something that's work-related? The space Steven and I live in, compared to other units in the building of approximately the same size, should go for at least $725-$750 per month. Now, although the gas and electricity are not in my name but in the name of the company I work for (by boss and owners), I actually am paying those bills when you consider the difference in prices of $725 compared to $900. I am paying for the electricity and gas and even more. I knew this about a month after I started working for the company. Did I mention anything about it? No. Why? Because with the way the economy was and the percentage of unemployment I was glad to have even had a job. And, even though I feel mistreated or disrespected at times, I'm still glad to have a job.
* In early December I sent them the phone bill for the office phone of the other building. They didn't pay it until over a month later. About a week before the payment was received by the phone company, I couldn't receive calls and I couldn't make calls. This meant I couldn't check for messages. It also meant that I couldn't receive phone calls from tenants or others inquiring of vacancies. One would think that of all the bills that need to be paid (electric, gas, phone, vendors, etc.), paying the phone bill is rather important.
I'm not going to go on and on with other times or instances where I felt disrespected. I could, but I won't. I think I've made my point. Both apartment buildings are up for sale, especially the one I'm the on-site manager of. It's my baby. It gets my main attention first and foremost. And the owners have told me that and have absolute confidence in that I can handle the building successfully. But I'm hoping this one sells soon. Because then maybe things will be different. Maybe. There's always a bit of a risk when an apartment building sells. Whoever buys it might want a different manager on-site. Then again they might not, especially after reviewing the rent-rolls and discovering how full the building is. The building I manage has 28 units (the other building has 37). A full building means money is coming in. But if the building has seven or more vacancies in it and has had such month after month after month, something's wrong there. Not to boast, but I'm good at what I do. I've been an apartment building manager on and off for many years. Even my mum and da were apartment managers when I was a teenager. I helped them out with cleaning apartments, painting them, and learned light maintenance skills during that time. So I know a few things. After a while, though, the business starts to wear me down. I don't have an assistant, so I'm on-call all the time. Getting away for even a weekend can be risky.
That's just about how I feel now. A bit worn out. Steven and I have talked over the months about moving back up north so that he can be closer to his family. I'm the last of my family line, so I consider his family my own. It's not quite the same, of course, but they're not from Wales or Scotland, either. So being different is okay. But the more we talk about it and the more we plan, the more we tend to think that things are actually pretty good right now. What used to be considered a probable 95% chance of us moving is currently more like a 60% chance. We doing okay financially in that I'm paid $10.00 per hour above the required 15 hour work week for various manager task duties and $15.00 per hour for whatever painting, cleaning, or maintenance work I do. Steven doesn't work right now, but that's okay. He can't. So he gets government assistance. That combined with my income gets us by without too much of a bother. While I work, he does whatever tasks at home he can: cleaning, laundry, cooking, running errands, and so on. We make a good team and I'm so very thankful for him. I certainly couldn't do both. However, if there's one thing we know it's this: That which is "certain" isn't always so "certain." So we've been saving our money for whatever may come our way.
We've discussed the idea of where we'd live once we move to Skagit County. Steven's parents have a lot at a secured and very wooded campground. Although we wouldn't stay on their lot, there are other lots for sale of which are quite affordable. Steven's rather new trailer, which is for sale, could be taken off the market and put on whichever lot best suits us. We'd be living simply, that's for sure. We'd have to downsize considerably, which is something we've also discussed and planned for. If that were to happen, we'd still have enough money to float us a few months before I'd have to look for another job. If, however, the trailer were to sell, we'd look into buying a used mobile home. That could be costly which would mean I'd have to find a job right away.
Anyway, we've been planning. We've both considered having the big move happen sometime toward the end of May. But, well, now we're not so sure. We have friends here, I'm involved in a church here, I'm working and we have a nice home (we're paying too much for it, but it's still nice). On the other hand, Steven's family is up north: His mum and da, his son and his girlfriend, his sister and her husband and children, and Steven's daughter and son-in-law and their two children. If we stayed here, we'd have to get a vehicle that's more dependable so that Steven or both he and I could head up north at least once a month. I know Steven could definitely have a fulfilling and pleasant week up there every once in a while. He's missing out on too much of their lives. Seeing family during Thanksgiving, Christmas or Easter... that's just not enough. Steven is down here because of me, because he wanted us to get back together and try being in a relationship again. And he has me. God knows he does.
All I can say right now is this: Things are the way they are. And though I'm thankful for the now, it's only in planning things out that I can be thankful for the then.
Until next time...
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Thursday, February 4, 2013
It's been a good day thus far. I've gotten a lot accomplished both personally and with my work at the apartment buildings.
Regarding work, the errands have been run, the office work has been fulfilled, installation of a secured cigarette butt container has been done for the T****s building, and notices posted. And, as of last night, I don't have any vacancies in either the Travis building nor the P******e apartment building. That is until about the middle of this month when I'll have a 1-Bedroom available in each. But people call regularly enough and I advertise the units with appealing specials, so I doubt they'll be vacant for long.
Regarding personal tasks, I've done some necessary shopping for food and supplies and have also gotten the laundry going as Steven is still a bit under the weather. When he got the flu, I think he caught his share of the virus as well as someone else's. He's doing what he can, though, around the house; dusting, sweeping, mopping... that sort of thing. I caution him not to overdo it. I make it a point to ask him if there's anything I can do or get for him.
I've gotten lucky thus far in that I haven't gotten sick at all. And that's good. I don't have time to get sick. And if I got sick, I'm quite sure I'd work through it anyway. I might cut back a couple of hours each day until I got better. But it's not like I have to be around people in a crowded office or anything like that. I'm in my own little office. Of which I pay rent for. Oh! Did I say that? I'm sorry. That will have to wait until another day.
I've had this job since mid-July of last year and I like what I'm doing. What I don't like is that I feel as though I'm some sort of adult babysitter. That and I don't like being tied to a phone just in case someone calls and has an emergency. And I'm not tied to just one phone, I'm tied to two of them. That is until my boss finds and hires a new manager for the T****s building, someone who can be a live-in manager. I was supposed to be the manager of it and my boss said it was okay, but he didn't clear that with the owners of the building who insist on having someone on-site.
The T****s Apartments fell into my lap in early October 2012 because the previous manager flaked out. After a month of proving myself and busting my backside, making order out of chaos, I asked my boss if I could manage the 38-unit building for an extra $1200 above what I make at the P******e Apartments. He said I could. And he shouldn't have.
My boss has had almost two months to find and hire someone to take over that building. As of today, I haven't heard anything about a replacement. I guess I shouldn't complain too much, though, because I'm actually getting the extra money for the time being (minus taxes, of course). But once someone is hired I won't be getting the $1200 nor will I be getting the medical and dental benefits.
I'm rather bitter about that. Why would he do that? Why would he give me the okay to be the full-time manager of both buildings without the owner's knowledge nor approval to do so? I cleaned up the building, inspected it from top to bottom, kicked out a problematic tenant, turned a confusing and unorganized office into an organized and well-functioning one, and I brought it down from having 9 vacancies to having 0 vacancies and all within 4 months time.
And he hasn't yet found nor hired a replacement.
Well, he'll be in a bit of a fix come May when I inform him that Steven and I will be moving up north to be closer to Steven's family. I will let him know in early May that Steven and I will be gone by the end of that month. That's about three week's notice, plenty of time considering that I really only have to give him two. And if he can't handle it, well I guess that's what he has an assistant for. I don't want to hear, "But couldn't you stick around until I find someone to replace you and then train the person?" "Sorry," will be my reply. "I'll be gone by the end of May."
You'll have noticed the ****'s. I've done that on purpose as I'm rather certain those names could be pulled up rather easily through a Google search. I don't want to run the risk of being canned or anything just yet in case my boss gets nosey or whatnot. That would ruin our plan to save up as much as possible until we move. Steven and I have come up with a Plan A, B, C, D, and E, so I think we're okay. His parents are concerned, but when it comes right down to it Steven and I have to do what's best for us. Steven came down here for me. He has me. And now he, we, need to be closer to family; closer to his parents, his kids, his grandkids, and closer to his sister and her husband and family. In our opinion, it's the healthy and wise thing to do.
Anyway, that's about it for now.
Until next time...
Regarding work, the errands have been run, the office work has been fulfilled, installation of a secured cigarette butt container has been done for the T****s building, and notices posted. And, as of last night, I don't have any vacancies in either the Travis building nor the P******e apartment building. That is until about the middle of this month when I'll have a 1-Bedroom available in each. But people call regularly enough and I advertise the units with appealing specials, so I doubt they'll be vacant for long.
Regarding personal tasks, I've done some necessary shopping for food and supplies and have also gotten the laundry going as Steven is still a bit under the weather. When he got the flu, I think he caught his share of the virus as well as someone else's. He's doing what he can, though, around the house; dusting, sweeping, mopping... that sort of thing. I caution him not to overdo it. I make it a point to ask him if there's anything I can do or get for him.
I've gotten lucky thus far in that I haven't gotten sick at all. And that's good. I don't have time to get sick. And if I got sick, I'm quite sure I'd work through it anyway. I might cut back a couple of hours each day until I got better. But it's not like I have to be around people in a crowded office or anything like that. I'm in my own little office. Of which I pay rent for. Oh! Did I say that? I'm sorry. That will have to wait until another day.
I've had this job since mid-July of last year and I like what I'm doing. What I don't like is that I feel as though I'm some sort of adult babysitter. That and I don't like being tied to a phone just in case someone calls and has an emergency. And I'm not tied to just one phone, I'm tied to two of them. That is until my boss finds and hires a new manager for the T****s building, someone who can be a live-in manager. I was supposed to be the manager of it and my boss said it was okay, but he didn't clear that with the owners of the building who insist on having someone on-site.
The T****s Apartments fell into my lap in early October 2012 because the previous manager flaked out. After a month of proving myself and busting my backside, making order out of chaos, I asked my boss if I could manage the 38-unit building for an extra $1200 above what I make at the P******e Apartments. He said I could. And he shouldn't have.
My boss has had almost two months to find and hire someone to take over that building. As of today, I haven't heard anything about a replacement. I guess I shouldn't complain too much, though, because I'm actually getting the extra money for the time being (minus taxes, of course). But once someone is hired I won't be getting the $1200 nor will I be getting the medical and dental benefits.
I'm rather bitter about that. Why would he do that? Why would he give me the okay to be the full-time manager of both buildings without the owner's knowledge nor approval to do so? I cleaned up the building, inspected it from top to bottom, kicked out a problematic tenant, turned a confusing and unorganized office into an organized and well-functioning one, and I brought it down from having 9 vacancies to having 0 vacancies and all within 4 months time.
And he hasn't yet found nor hired a replacement.
Well, he'll be in a bit of a fix come May when I inform him that Steven and I will be moving up north to be closer to Steven's family. I will let him know in early May that Steven and I will be gone by the end of that month. That's about three week's notice, plenty of time considering that I really only have to give him two. And if he can't handle it, well I guess that's what he has an assistant for. I don't want to hear, "But couldn't you stick around until I find someone to replace you and then train the person?" "Sorry," will be my reply. "I'll be gone by the end of May."
You'll have noticed the ****'s. I've done that on purpose as I'm rather certain those names could be pulled up rather easily through a Google search. I don't want to run the risk of being canned or anything just yet in case my boss gets nosey or whatnot. That would ruin our plan to save up as much as possible until we move. Steven and I have come up with a Plan A, B, C, D, and E, so I think we're okay. His parents are concerned, but when it comes right down to it Steven and I have to do what's best for us. Steven came down here for me. He has me. And now he, we, need to be closer to family; closer to his parents, his kids, his grandkids, and closer to his sister and her husband and family. In our opinion, it's the healthy and wise thing to do.
Anyway, that's about it for now.
Until next time...
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Steven & I
Steven and I have known each other for about seven years now. We've been a couple for most of that time. As odd as it may seem, we've even broken up with each other twice. I won't get into details only to say we were together for a while, he broke up with me, in time we couldn't stand to be apart, so we got together again. Then, after quite some time passed, I broke up with him, we remained friends, talked a bit, understood some things, and then got back together. Crazy, right? But maybe not so much.
I say that because no matter how bad things may have gotten, I've learned to hold on to the good. Were we physically abusive? Absolutely not. I'm sure it would have been a different story then. In time, and when our wits came into play and when we calmed down a bit in our hearts and minds, we came to learn some things about each other as well as ourselves. We've learned when we both need to have our own space. We've discovered and accepted when we just need to shut up and not take things personal. I'm certain Steven has learned things about himself that he could work on. And I've learned that I need to work on not being so self-centered or selfish. Can you believe it? It's really not all about me! I know, right? When did that happen?!?
Through the years, I've learned that if I can laugh at it, I can live with it. When Steven and I got back together in the spring of 2012, I think I've laughed more since that time and yelled less. I've learned that life is 10% what happens and 90% how we respond to it. I've also learned that attitudes are contagious. And if that's so, what kind of "flu" or "bacteria" am I spreading?
Steven is 8 years older than me. Does that mean there's no hope for my trying to understand his way of doing or communicating things? Certainly not. If there's confusion about something or unclarity, we check in with each other to make sure we're on the same page. Communication is, after all, essential no matter what the relationship. Do we still falter and slip sometimes? Of course we do. No relationship is absolutely perfect. Too many times I have heard or read somewhere someone saying, "I'm looking for the perfect man." I guess they're waiting for Jesus. As for me, I have Steven. And Jesus. That's perfect enough for me.
Except for when we've been apart, Steven have done two things every day (well, more than two, really, but these two have really been important): 1) We hold hands, and 2) we tell each other, "I love you." And sometimes more than once a day. Whether someone is gay or straight, I truly believe that love is the glue that keeps people together. Hatred, bitterness, jealousy, unfaithfulness, disrespect, selfishness... all those and the like are components that dissolve and eat away at the glue.
Steven and I love each other. We laugh together almost daily. Will we get married one day? We'll see. We've talked about it. And I have a plan as to how I'd propose to him. But, believe it or not, Steven and I have both been married before. To women. I know, I know. Don't get me started. That's a story for another day. Anyway, we'd probably just have a ceremony of sorts. But for now, well, it's as if we've been a couple for a long, long time. And we have been. But we're stronger now than we were when we first started our relationship.
And I have no regrets. Actually, just one: I wish I could've been a better man for Steven years ago. But the good news is I'm striving to be a better man for him today. He deserves the best from me.
And he'll get it.
I say that because no matter how bad things may have gotten, I've learned to hold on to the good. Were we physically abusive? Absolutely not. I'm sure it would have been a different story then. In time, and when our wits came into play and when we calmed down a bit in our hearts and minds, we came to learn some things about each other as well as ourselves. We've learned when we both need to have our own space. We've discovered and accepted when we just need to shut up and not take things personal. I'm certain Steven has learned things about himself that he could work on. And I've learned that I need to work on not being so self-centered or selfish. Can you believe it? It's really not all about me! I know, right? When did that happen?!?
Through the years, I've learned that if I can laugh at it, I can live with it. When Steven and I got back together in the spring of 2012, I think I've laughed more since that time and yelled less. I've learned that life is 10% what happens and 90% how we respond to it. I've also learned that attitudes are contagious. And if that's so, what kind of "flu" or "bacteria" am I spreading?
Steven is 8 years older than me. Does that mean there's no hope for my trying to understand his way of doing or communicating things? Certainly not. If there's confusion about something or unclarity, we check in with each other to make sure we're on the same page. Communication is, after all, essential no matter what the relationship. Do we still falter and slip sometimes? Of course we do. No relationship is absolutely perfect. Too many times I have heard or read somewhere someone saying, "I'm looking for the perfect man." I guess they're waiting for Jesus. As for me, I have Steven. And Jesus. That's perfect enough for me.
Except for when we've been apart, Steven have done two things every day (well, more than two, really, but these two have really been important): 1) We hold hands, and 2) we tell each other, "I love you." And sometimes more than once a day. Whether someone is gay or straight, I truly believe that love is the glue that keeps people together. Hatred, bitterness, jealousy, unfaithfulness, disrespect, selfishness... all those and the like are components that dissolve and eat away at the glue.
Steven and I love each other. We laugh together almost daily. Will we get married one day? We'll see. We've talked about it. And I have a plan as to how I'd propose to him. But, believe it or not, Steven and I have both been married before. To women. I know, I know. Don't get me started. That's a story for another day. Anyway, we'd probably just have a ceremony of sorts. But for now, well, it's as if we've been a couple for a long, long time. And we have been. But we're stronger now than we were when we first started our relationship.
And I have no regrets. Actually, just one: I wish I could've been a better man for Steven years ago. But the good news is I'm striving to be a better man for him today. He deserves the best from me.
And he'll get it.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Though the weather outside has been dreary these past couple of weeks, I am thankful that I'm not struggling as others are in the northern and northeastern states. We received a smidge of a threat of snow about a month ago, but that quickly melted away within half a day of receiving it. Not much rain, either. Yesterday there were a few sprinkles, but that's all. Frost and fog, on the other hand, has been prevalent for about two weeks now. But not today. Today we had clear skies with a hint of sun this morning. Now, once again, and as usual, it is overcast and grey.
I don't mind the weather, really. I prefer the cold as opposed to the extreme heat. Steven, my partner, loves the warmer temperatures. Me, not so much. Maybe eighty-five degrees maximum, perhaps ninety. Anything above that and I'll most certainly want to sit in the freezer in nothing but my shorts and undershirt.
Enough of the weather. That's small-talk. And if that's "small talk," then I assume "big talk" would be how I'm doing at work or how I'm doing presently regarding life in general or even how Steven and I are doing in our relationship. Fine. I shall adress the first as it is rather lengthy (the other two shall have to wait til another day). I won't go into every minute detail, but will share the "meat and bones" of it, as it were.
When I first started working as an apartment manager for the corporation I'm currently with, which started mid-July of 2012, I was estatic. I was impressing my boss as well as the tenants and owners of the building left and right. And I suppose I still am in some way or another. But I've been jilted in various ways by my boss these past couple of months and, in my opinion to be perfectly honest, been disrespected and treated unfairly. This 100 year old building has 28 units. When I arrived there were four vacancies. Now we're completely full and noone has given a hint of wanting to move (though there are one or two tenants I wish would give notice). The former manager kept the office unruly and chaotic which took a good couple of weeks to bring about to some sort of sense and order. I've cleaned and painted apartments, vacuumed and swept the landings, stairs and lobby areas, handled office affairs, performed some maintenance duties and put into place certain vendors to handle maintenance issues that I either didn't have time to get to or that were out of my expertise to perform, and I've resolved tenant-to-tenant problems. Basically speaking, I did my job.
In the second week of October 2012, the manager I replaced here (I won't mention the name at this time) left the other building the owners own unattended. That building (of which I also won't mention the name of) is five blocks away from the other apartment building. To make a long story short, my boss called me and asked if I would get the keys and gather up the rent checks as no deposit had been made at all that month. I got the keys, went to the office on-site there and found many checks and money orders all over the office floor. With those checks and money orders (which totalled over $16,000) I was able to assemble a rough draft of a rent roll, figuring out who was in which apartment. Since then I've had to bring to order that office and affairs much as I've had to do here. After the first month of proving I could manage both buildings my boss agreed to let me do so with an extra pay of $1200 per month which meant I could get benefits (of which I've never had in my entire life). But come mid-December when the owners found out I was managing both buildings, they showed and made known verbally their disapproval stating that they've never had any luck with one manager managing two buildings and would prefer a manager living on-site.
That really, really irked me and then some! My boss didn't have the approval of the owners to let me manage both buildings and I thought he had. I would have expected him to have done so before offering me the fine opportunity. The week before Christmas I was in that building handing out notices and Christmas cards whilst Steven was back home on the laptop perusing jobs and whatnot. When I got home, he brought to my attention an ad he came across: An advertisement of an apartment building needing an apartment manager. For the building I was managing! Although I knew it would come down to that, noone discussed with me that such an ad would be placed. Noone told me that such a task would be undertaken. I read the ad and called up my boss' assistant as her name and number was listed as being the contact person. When I called her and asked her about, not even she knew about it. She talked to her (and my) boss and was told he felt pressured by the owners to do so and that he was apologetic and would call me and apologize to me as well after he got out of a meeting.
That phone call never came. And to this day, neither did the apology. So, I'm out the extra $1200 per month as well as the benefits.
Don't you know that I busted my backside for that building within that first month of taking over, even so far as to inspecting each unit, addressing tenant's needs and maintenance requests that went unresolved or uncared for for many weeks, months, and sometimes even over a year. Within three months time I brought the 38-unit building from having nine vacancies down to having only one. And now I can't manage it. Oh, I'm being the team-player and managing it somewhat until they hire someone. But certainly not with the gusto I showed at first.
Now, as far as how I am doing personally and how Steven and I are doing, well... that will just have to wait til another day, my friend.
For now, I bid you adieu. Until next time...
Cheers!
I don't mind the weather, really. I prefer the cold as opposed to the extreme heat. Steven, my partner, loves the warmer temperatures. Me, not so much. Maybe eighty-five degrees maximum, perhaps ninety. Anything above that and I'll most certainly want to sit in the freezer in nothing but my shorts and undershirt.
Enough of the weather. That's small-talk. And if that's "small talk," then I assume "big talk" would be how I'm doing at work or how I'm doing presently regarding life in general or even how Steven and I are doing in our relationship. Fine. I shall adress the first as it is rather lengthy (the other two shall have to wait til another day). I won't go into every minute detail, but will share the "meat and bones" of it, as it were.
When I first started working as an apartment manager for the corporation I'm currently with, which started mid-July of 2012, I was estatic. I was impressing my boss as well as the tenants and owners of the building left and right. And I suppose I still am in some way or another. But I've been jilted in various ways by my boss these past couple of months and, in my opinion to be perfectly honest, been disrespected and treated unfairly. This 100 year old building has 28 units. When I arrived there were four vacancies. Now we're completely full and noone has given a hint of wanting to move (though there are one or two tenants I wish would give notice). The former manager kept the office unruly and chaotic which took a good couple of weeks to bring about to some sort of sense and order. I've cleaned and painted apartments, vacuumed and swept the landings, stairs and lobby areas, handled office affairs, performed some maintenance duties and put into place certain vendors to handle maintenance issues that I either didn't have time to get to or that were out of my expertise to perform, and I've resolved tenant-to-tenant problems. Basically speaking, I did my job.
In the second week of October 2012, the manager I replaced here (I won't mention the name at this time) left the other building the owners own unattended. That building (of which I also won't mention the name of) is five blocks away from the other apartment building. To make a long story short, my boss called me and asked if I would get the keys and gather up the rent checks as no deposit had been made at all that month. I got the keys, went to the office on-site there and found many checks and money orders all over the office floor. With those checks and money orders (which totalled over $16,000) I was able to assemble a rough draft of a rent roll, figuring out who was in which apartment. Since then I've had to bring to order that office and affairs much as I've had to do here. After the first month of proving I could manage both buildings my boss agreed to let me do so with an extra pay of $1200 per month which meant I could get benefits (of which I've never had in my entire life). But come mid-December when the owners found out I was managing both buildings, they showed and made known verbally their disapproval stating that they've never had any luck with one manager managing two buildings and would prefer a manager living on-site.
That really, really irked me and then some! My boss didn't have the approval of the owners to let me manage both buildings and I thought he had. I would have expected him to have done so before offering me the fine opportunity. The week before Christmas I was in that building handing out notices and Christmas cards whilst Steven was back home on the laptop perusing jobs and whatnot. When I got home, he brought to my attention an ad he came across: An advertisement of an apartment building needing an apartment manager. For the building I was managing! Although I knew it would come down to that, noone discussed with me that such an ad would be placed. Noone told me that such a task would be undertaken. I read the ad and called up my boss' assistant as her name and number was listed as being the contact person. When I called her and asked her about, not even she knew about it. She talked to her (and my) boss and was told he felt pressured by the owners to do so and that he was apologetic and would call me and apologize to me as well after he got out of a meeting.
That phone call never came. And to this day, neither did the apology. So, I'm out the extra $1200 per month as well as the benefits.
Don't you know that I busted my backside for that building within that first month of taking over, even so far as to inspecting each unit, addressing tenant's needs and maintenance requests that went unresolved or uncared for for many weeks, months, and sometimes even over a year. Within three months time I brought the 38-unit building from having nine vacancies down to having only one. And now I can't manage it. Oh, I'm being the team-player and managing it somewhat until they hire someone. But certainly not with the gusto I showed at first.
Now, as far as how I am doing personally and how Steven and I are doing, well... that will just have to wait til another day, my friend.
For now, I bid you adieu. Until next time...
Cheers!
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